It has been terribly hectic here for the past few weeks and although I definately needed to 'ramble' here and there, there was just no time. There was a blizzard last nite and since I can barely open my door more than five inches, and there is no way this overindulged 'holiday body' will squeeze through it, I am stuck here to continue cleaning from days of merriment....merridom....merryness....fun! So I will ramble on........
I love to shop. I hate to shop at Christmas time. I also hate lines....and rude people and an empty wallet and sales ploys that confuse me and make me think that I am getting a bargain when I am not. But I shopped right up til Christmas Eve, ran into rude people and out of money...and whether I got a bargain or not I finished my shopping in the nick of time.
I did alot of shopping on line this year. Amazon, Walmart.com, and some strange sites my son sent me for his mountain biking gear. I did make it alot easier and except for tipping my UPS man and the fact that I now know my Mastercard number by heart, a lot cheaper as well. Gotta love FREE SHIPPING!!! But good old fashion store shopping can't be beat so I went to Sears in the Kings Plaza Mall so that I had something to complain about. (And fodder for this blog I suppose) I park on the roof now since last year I wandered around endlessly looking for my car which I swore was parked on the blue level and wasn't. The roof also has an entrance directly into Sears so I don't get killed buying a wrench or some other ratcheting item for you know who. They were having a sale on some tools that my husband asked me to pick up. Why he finds the need to buy stuff for himself the week before Christmas is beyond me. Plan A...buy the items, tell him they were out of them, wrap them and slip them under the tree. Plan B...they really were out of them, look for another tool he doesn't have four of already.
I went to Modells. I wanted to buy something Yankees for my son in law. For some reason everyone in the store was 6'5" or better. I felt like Gulliver. I am short so looking up is nothing new, but this was crazy. I walked around looking for what I wanted, but it seemed that everything I wanted was hanging eight feet off the floor. I found the 'stick' that they use to get them up there in the first place and began the tedious task of finding the right size. Medium...too small and short Large...too big and you'd need to have monkey arms to see your hands...Youth Large...ummm, no! OK, gonna need help. Looked for someone to help. (They call them associates now...still get paid employee salaries, but it sounds more impressive to be called an associate I guess) The 9 foot 'associate' came over to help, looked a little pissy that I had taken down so many shirts to check for sizes but helped me find the size I needed. He mumbled under his associate breath as I walked toward the register and he re-hung all the wrong sized items without even having to use the 'stick.'
I went to Kohls...to Toys R Us....to Telco....to Century 21 and to Macy's. I went to Walgreens and Rite-Aid and CVS. I came home to find two messages from my credit card company. They were simply recorded messages asking me that if I hadn't been on some wild spending spree please call them because someone was clearly using my card in a reckless manner. Helloooo, it's Christmastime! If it was August 4th or May 9th I could see the concern....but it was December 15th??? But, I suppose, had I lost the card and someone was in fact shopping with the Modell associate without me, I would have appreciated the call. I also got a call that they were lowering my credit limit. Lowering! Are they crazy?
I spend most nights wrapping and recording what I bought. I have to make lists because I tend to forget and buy again for the same person. Sometimes I even buy the same thing for the same person. So my apologies to anyone who got two scarves or two Old Navy pajama sets, or two animal print Snuggies....try to keep in mind it's the thought that counts. Kids and grandkids gifts get wrapped, bagged and hauled upstairs to be hidden until Christmas Eve. After all the Santa believers are home and in bed, my son has the dubious task of carting all the bags of gifts down and arranging them under the tree. (and half way across the living room) This year I bought my stinky dog cologne CK-9 (hahaha) and a stocking full of squeaking dog toys. By Christmas morning not one thing squeaked and the living room had snow-like foam adorning every crevice. Note to self: Give dog one toy at a time!Nothing says Christmas more than the Chia Pet Obama Head which went over well, as did Catch Phrase a game that allows you to make a fool out of yourself by not being able to answer simple questions in miniscule time frames. I got the Canadian tenors CD which I listened to all day as I cleaned and made it feel like Christmas morning all over again. I also got several books which although my husband bought me a Kindle last year, I miss licking my finger and page turning. I miss folding the page when I put the book down to get a snack. Jay-Z, Whoopie, Sarah and Stephen King all await my attention. Yes, it was a very eclectic Christmas. I got zip drives and bloomers. I got a keyboard and keychains. I got gift cards and tupperware. I got earrings and ear muffs, cologne, coffee and cash. And I loved everyone of them!
Christmas lasted three days this year. If we continue this way we will have to get a menorah just to keep track. Christmas Eve we did the whole Italian 7 fish dinner. Four courses, seven fishes (although there were really only 5 but since two were cooked differently I rounded it up to 7), two macaroni's (shells and spaghetti) and enough desserts to kill a horse. (or a diabetic!) Tons of food, tons of gifts and tons of dishes! Christmas day started with breakfast because apparently we didn't have enough to eat the night before. I cooked the bacon with my As Seen On TV microwave bacon cooker which is the best gift I have ever bought myself. We also had sausage and eggs and pancakes and waffles....so of course my husband wanted to know where the bagels were? More food, more gifts, more dishes. Off to my sister in laws for Christmas dinner for, you guessed it...even more food, even more gifts and even more dishes. Since my son was not at breakfast and we had yet to see my in-laws, Sunday the 26th was day 3 of our Christmas fare. Still more food (cold cuts this time), still more gifts and still more dishes (paper, yay!) Dinnertime rolled around and leftovers were reheated and re-served but thankfully there were no more gifts and all disposable dishes. Our bellies beyond full, the tree overcrowded with gifts, the snow started to fall. And fall. And fall.
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